3 days.
no sms, no phone call, no messages.
shes enjoying her life without me.
or the least surviving without me.
she used to never fail to miss me from not even seeing me for a day.
giving me good mornings and good nights.
coming online to appear offline on msn just to chat with me.
amazing how things change.

cant seem to get you off my mind.
disregarding the fact that your heart is no longer for me.
i know.
cause i can feel it.
more like i cant.
it hurts every night.

i tried keeping myself occupied.
but after every thing that i do, you always manage to slip back into my mind.
trying to sleep always makes me think.
so i figured it would be a good idea to tire myself out until i fall asleep.
i managed to, somehow.
slept at 6am.

i thought it would have been easier due to the fact that i walked home instead of taking the bus.
there were no more buses.
not even the feeder service.
well except for nightriders but they dont apply to the situation.

why do i keep tormenting myself?
why cant i just let her go and be done with it?
why cant i just accept the fact that we're not together and she doesnt fucking love me anymore?
because its just fucking hard.
and im fucking weak.
losing out and going crazy because of you.

call me emo or whatever.
i have a torrent full of undischarged emotions.
let me release them.
wave by wave.
ive run out of options.
save me.

baby won't you come and take this pain away.

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